So, don't let the title of this post fool you, I love to fly. I love the excitement of the airport, the TV screen with a never-ending list of destinations, the people watching, the time I spend imagining why every other person is flying to wherever they're flying to (example: guy in skinny jeans is off to surprise his long-distance girlfriend and propose to her in New York City atop a candlelit rooftop... they're always romantic stories, what did you expect?) and most of all I love traveling. Duh.
BUT, sometimes flying is more annoying than a snag in a brand-new pair of tights. And because I brought home a lovely cold with me from my recent flight to San Francisco, I am feeling particularly bitter. So here's my personal list of the top ten worst things about flying.
1. Recycled airplane air... it's a breeding ground for germs and you really only needed to smell that old lady's far-too-floral perfume once, thanks.
2. The line at Starbucks.
3. The 3-1-1 liquid rule for carry-ons. What do you mean I cannot bring my (way too expensive) perfume with me on my weekend jaunt? Don't you realize a woman's outfit is never complete without her signature scent (just ask Coco Chanel)!!
4. The stealthy farter that stinks up the whole freakin' airplane but can never be identified because he is silent but deadly.
5. Personal space invaders: arm rest hogs, the guy in front of you that reclines his head so far back that he's practically in your lap, the lady behind you that puts her un-pedicured foot on your arm rest and thinks that you're not going to notice.
6. Chatty neighbors...nope, I actually didn't want to hear about your neighbor's daughter's c-section complications.
7. Taking your shoes off when walking through security... thinking of all the feet that made the trek before yours is more cringe-worthy than stepping in a fraternity shower sans sandals.
8. The food. It's just too obvious to say that the sodium infused lumps of "food" airlines serve are sub par... but what really gets me is the people that bring stinky homemade entrees to be consumed in flight.
9. The scary airplane toilet bowls. Flush that puppy and it feels like you're going to be sucked out of the plane's jet.
10. Baggage charges. High heels are heavy and they take up space. This is an unfair attack on women... obviously.
What do you think travelers? Anything I forgot?
Image 1 via dimbulb.net, Image 3 via Jaunted.com